Monday, January 31, 2011

I'm Not With Them...

Today the kids and I took the dogs for a walk.  It was a mild-weather day; it seemed like a great idea. 

Turned out, not so much.  The Labs spazzed like I have never seen them spazz before.  I mean, these guys acted like they'd never been on a walk before.

We walked our usual mile and a half loop.  We walked with our usual friends.  Nothing out of the ordinary.

Perhaps I should have recognized in the first three minutes of the walk that this would not be a fruitful venture...

Right off the bat, I forgot the garage door opener.  I was holding Indy's leash, and had just gotten down to the bottom of our drive when I realized I'd have to suddenly acquire Jeannie's magical eye squint and head bob to shut the door.  I groaned and coaxed Indy back up the drive with me to grab the opener out of my truck.  He strained (I wanna go on a longer walk!)  but finally trudged back up the drive with me. 

As I reached into the truck, Indy channeled his inner Mathew Wilder... "Ain't nothin gonna break my stride, Nobody's gonna slow me down, oh-no I got to keep on moving... Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride I'm running and I won't touch ground Oh-no, I got to keep on moving"... and lunged out of the garage.

I pieced myself back together, gave a good c'mere tug on the leash, and we walked back down the drive together. 

The rest of the outing followed suit.  Apparently, Jack and Indy both forgot how to walk.  They sort of weaved and bobbed in and out of trees, garbage cans, between my friend and I, clotheslining my friend several times  {Oops, sorry!   Sorry again!  Eesh, you okay?  Dumb dogs.}

They also forgot that they had, and for some time now, mastered continence.  I know they were excited, but good grief!  I was out of disposal bags by the third block. 

By the first mile marker, with little or no change in the dogs' doofy behavior, we took a short-cut back to the house, dropped them off in the back yard, and traversed on sans "man's best friends".

At dinner, Ken asked me how my day was.  I shot him an all-encompassing look. 
 Ken: That good, eh?  Was it the kids, the dogs, the bills or the laundry?
Me: (dramatic eyeroll and disgusted sigh) The dogs.
I went on to describe in great detail(can you believe no one wanted seconds?) the utter disaster the walk had been. 
Ken: How was Lucy in all of this?
Me:  (thinking for a minute) She was great!  In fact, I don't think she's ever been spazzy on a walk.  She walks straight, retains all bodily matter, and has a pleasant look on her face. 
Ken: Except today (smirking) I bet today she was like, 'I'm not with them; I've never seen them before in my life!'

 Bingo.


3 comments:

  1. Sorry for the spazz walk. But you make it all sound so funny! *giggle*
    *Allie*

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, as tough as the walk turned out, I'm so glad that you posted, Heather...we do love to read your observations on your canine family and life in general!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks Allie, hearing your giggle is worth having a spazzy walk to blog about.

    Thanks, sometimes it's stuff only a mom(or dad) would care to read. Maybe I should just email you all my stories... ;) Thanks for your support.

    Love you both!

    ReplyDelete