Thursday, August 4, 2011

This Could Get Ugly

Tonight we attempt to conquer what has never been successfully completed with Lucy: a full groom.  Lucy is one smart cookie, and quite the Alpha Dog.  That means, she wants to be in charge.  Run the show.  Be the boss.  And bosses don't have people holding their paws and trimming their nails.  That would mean someone else is in charge.

The state of her nails, however, is going on Guinness Record length.  We've futilely tried to clip them with everything from bribery  {You're still the Boss; here, have a treat}  to tough love  {Darn it, Lu, we're the people, you need to sit still when we tell you!}.  Neither approach has worked.  I've lost two shirts in the process.  Ken has permanent scratch marks on his arms.  This is clearly worth the $12 for the technicians(?) at the pet store to attempt.  {do they prefer to be called technicians?}

It's more than just nails, as Lucy has grown, her wiry hair has gotten... well, wiry!  Something needs to be done for it.  To it?  It's so different from the big dogs.  Labs are the epitome of ease.  Maybe hose 'em off on a warm day, let air dry.  Ta-da!  Done.  Their nails wear down pretty well on walks, and Jack is really good about sitting down for his nail trims(on the back porch, not in a spa)  Okay, Indy's afraid of getting his nails done, but I have kids who are too.  Eventually, with a large enough pile of treats, they'll sit for it. 

I asked around the neighborhood and got a recommendation for a good local groomer.  I called two days ago and spoke with two very intelligent sounding ladies.  {Pet Professionals?  Canine Commandos?  Spaz Specialists?}  The last one I talked to {let's just say, Stephanie} would actually be there for the groom.  Stephanie reassured me that if the dogs start to freak out - she put it more professionally, like "if they're showing signs of increased adrenaline" - they will end the groom and recommend a vet, who has access to an array of sedation methods. 

It's funny, on the phone I found myself defensively stammering, "Even though we have a little dog, this is not the sort of thing we do.  We don't care how she looks, we just thought she'd be more comfortable.  {Read: no need to trod out the latest bows, hair dye, or raincoats.}  We are just regular dog people.  Big dog people, really... we have Labs.  We've never taken our Labs to the groomers before.  Labs are the epitome of ease!

Even though I suppose we are more favorable to little dogs now, I still don't identify with the stereotypes.  Odd that I still can't let go of the stereotype: images of Chihuahuas in purses; Miniature Poodles with their perfectly coiffed heads stiffly sticking out the windows of perfectly polished Mercedes;  people with little dogs, prancing to the groomers... Well, I can promise there will be no prancing today.  Or any other day.  Sheesh.

Wish us luck; this could get ugly.  I'll keep you posted.  Unless something goes terribly wrong at the Dog Spa.  Like, they really didn't know what they were in for: Lucy breaks loose, violently mauls the ... Stephanie, and we are subsequently sued.  Then I suppose for legal reasons I couldn't post anything.  Apart from that, I'll keep you posted.

Happy Thursday, everyone! 
As always, I'm delighted you stopped by to join us for a while. 
Do come again soon.


Did that last part sound too British?  I've been engulfed in the Flavia de Luce mystery novels as of late. 
They are addicting.  Love 'em. 
But watch out; you will start having inner monologues with a decidedly British flavour to them. 

{Alan Bradley, the author, has no idea who I am.  This is just a personal tangent on a new series I happen to love. 
And possibly an explanation as to why I wrote, "Do come again soon"}


  1. *hahahaha* Don't worry, I've been praying a WHOLE lot! Love you Mom,

  2. WELL....we're WAITING with bated breath to hear the rest of the story!!! =) Please don't keep us in suspense too long - does Lucy Lu sweetly allow Stephanie to quickly and easily snip those long nails and fluff that wired hair into a chic look OR ????

  3. Allie, Thanks! It totally worked :) Lucy did such a good job.

    Mom, you're too funny. She did great and looks tres chic!